Yesterday, Lucy sent me a link to an article on The Huffington Post: Kate Walsh vs. Bristol Palin on Sex Talk. Basically, Bristol had been scheduled to give a speech at Washington University, on abstinence. Kate Walsh tweeted in support of the student protest, saying, “What does [Bristol Palin] know about college or abstaining?”

You know, if that’s the kind of credentials Washington University looks for in guest speakers…Washington U., do I have a proposition for you!

I would love to give a speech at your institution. As I have been unemployed for almost eight months now, I am perfectly qualified to give a lecture on “Finding a Job in Any Economy.” Or, as I am unhappily single and lonely, how about “The Secrets to a Healthy and Happy Relationship.”

But that’s not all! As a native of Buffalo, NY who grew up literally on the shores of Lake Erie, with the ability to see Canada from her bedroom window, I am also a foreign policy expert – just like the entire Palin family!

So Washington University, please be in touch.

 

(For the record – still off beef, still off lamb…right after my last post on the topic I saw Anthony Bourdain kill a pig in Malaysia, and yes, it did send me off pork. And now, thanks to a Bones rerun about a factory chicken farm, I’m off non-free-range poultry (with the exception of the chicken thighs that were already in my freezer, which might actually be free-range, anyway).)

(And I have until Ash Wednesday, March 9th, to get a job. Because on March 10th I turn 33, and it sucks being a hybrid of two Avenue Q characters.)

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